Ok folks, I need your help! As we draw even closer to Allhallows Eve, my roommate Mike a.k.a. JMike a.k.a. Muffin a.k.a. Hateful Cow is still piddling around with his costume. We are all looking forward to setting our eyes on Camilla Toe (see below) this year. It was 2006 - a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away – since anyone has groped or witnessed the gross misconduct that is Camilla. Mike, JMike, Muffin, Hateful Cow….we are begging you to bring her back! We need magnificent Halloween entertainment this year. It has not been the same since you last pulled out those chicken wings from those droopy, sandbags tucked in your belt you called breasts.

Just as you did when you where a child and clapped your hands to bring Tinkerbell back to life, help me bring Camilla Toe back by bitch slapping someone….anyone. That’s right! That’s all it takes. The harder your slap, the better it is. Each time you bitch slap someone, it helps to bring Camilla Toe back to us. Instead of giving that high five for a job well done, smack a bitch up. Sit out on the sidewalk in front of your house; extend out your hand and slap those children running by on their way home from school. Let them run right into it! It’s simple; it’s so easy that everyone can do it. Tell a friend, tell a co-worker, tell your frienemies! In fact, don’t tell them, show them!

We miss that scraggly, been everywhere red hair that looks like it took a roll through a forest. Please, please bring her back! It just hasn’t been the same!

Want to see more quality posts? Help bring this blog back to life by doing your part and put out your cigarette on the bottom of a child's foot.